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Encouragement for the Journey>
What Did You Say?
Watching our words is a serious matter. How often do you say things that shouldn't be said? God is able to purify your tongue - give Him access to it!
What Did You Say?
A Word Fitly Spoken
I always like to give a bit of spiritual edification before launching into the nuts and bolts of homeschooling. Since we are focusing on speech, I want to take the opportunity to discuss our own speech: the words that we allow to proceed from our lips, to be exact.
This topic is really close to home for all of us, as we all struggle with our tongues. In fact, in James 3:2, James says that you reach perfect maturity when you master your tongue. So, don’t be discouraged if you are far from the mark.
Sadly, for me, it seems that just when I think I’m reaching the mark, I fall back a mile and have to start over. Like many of you, I need encouragement to keep my tongue under control. My children appreciate every level of sanctification that God bestows upon me in this area.
We all remember that childhood proverb, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Whoever said that lived in a bubble. Why do we recall, with a stab of emotion, the painful words that have been spoken to or about us in the past? Proverbs 18:21 says it all: “Death and life are in the power of the tongue.”
Death and life. Wow. That little wiggly red thing under our nose sure packs a lot of power!
Why, then, do we not realize that our words have so much power? I know in my own life, unkind words spoken to me have indeed brought a death of sorts: death to my joy, my peace, and my courage to persevere. Words cause me to walk in fear and trepidation, and move me to discouragement and even despair at times. Yes, words have power.
On the other hand, the anointed words of a godly friend impart life to me. A word fitly spoken truly is like apples of gold in settings of silver. It can inspire me to move forward in faith, to work with diligence and joy, to throw off fear and embrace life … and it can even move me to impart that same gift of life to others.
I want to surround myself with women that speak life into me. I want to be a woman that speaks life into others.
Our words matter to God. I wish I could always keep that truth at the forefront of my mind. I am reminded over and over again when I hear the words from Matthew 12:36: “But I tell you, every careless word that people speak, they will give an accounting for it in the Day of Judgment.”
Unfortunately, in the church and in the world, we all meet people who say things that make us feel defensive. They seem to be masters at furtively sneaking in hurtful comments during conversations. Their critical spirits cause us to feel inadequate and insecure in their presence. (This originates out of fear of man, another subject I’ll cover in another issue.)
Sadly, we’ve also met women who unpack gossip about others, sometimes disguised as a prayer request. We hear their critical words, and find ourselves feeling critical too … or fearful that we will soon be criticized. Their words are powerful, indeed. If we don’t guard ourselves, we can easily fall into these very patterns. Yet, getting free is easy … repentance is all it takes. God does the rest.
Unloving, critical words are not the only words that can bring a kind of death…death to our own peace. The Israelites were kept out of the Promised Land because they were negative, critical and complaining. The KJV translates it as murmuring. That means they quietly muttered their irritation and disapproval to those around them. We are told that God’s will for us is that we not complain about anything.
Have we been guilty of softly voicing our irritation and disapproval? In my own life, I’ve stood outside the Promised Land on many occasions because of just such an attitude.
I recently realized that this murmuring, this complaining attitude, even when disguised as concern, is contagious. When I meet people who complain and give voice to their criticisms, my natural reaction is to fall into it myself. Suddenly, my once bright and sunny day falls under a shadow of discontent.
Yes, the power of the tongue is truly remarkable. It does indeed bring death and destruction. We see with our eyes and hear with our ears the power of destruction that can proceed from the mouth.
If we have been guilty of such offenses of the tongue, let’s consider turning from it today. What kind of women do we desire to be? When people walk away from us, do we want them to leave licking their wounds, or despoiled by the gossip or complaints pouring from our lips?
My heart’s desire, and yours as well, is to be a woman that imparts life, not death, with my tongue. I want people to feel uplifted and encouraged when they leave my presence. When I speak, I want people to hear the love of Jesus, the compassionate Lover of everyone, even sinners, in my words. I want them to see Him in my eyes and in my actions.
I have, in the past, found myself wanting in this arena. When the Lord showed me that I was walking in the attitude of a complaining, unloving spirit, I fell on my face before Him and cried, “Oh! Lord! I’ve gotten so far off the path! I complain so much! I don’t look with eyes of love upon those You love. I am so inwardly focused! I repent! As you promise to do, cleanse me from all unrighteousness. Cleanse me from within. Take control of my tongue, and the heart that feeds it the death I’ve been allowing to come out of it. Your Word says, ‘No man can tame the tongue.’ But Lord, You are able. I trust You right now to complete this work in me.”
At that point of repentance, He began to restore my heart and the words that spoke its thoughts. I memorized and repeated often Phillipians 4:8 “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things.”
In the end, it was “Not by might. Not by Power. But by His Spirit” that I was able to stop complaining and thinking negative, critical thoughts. At that point, I was filled with joy and genuine love for others.
I hope that if ever you find yourself in this situation, you will remember how mighty God is to save us from these things. He will usher us, once again, back into the Promised Land of our salvation, where we can have true peace, by walking in a way that is pleasing to Him.
Jeannie Fulbright
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